The Things You Can Learn from Asparagus

I just discovered the Garden Rant blog last week, and I have a full-on blog-crush on it. Gardening with an attitude, who knew.

This post on Asparagus – but actually about so much more – is just awesome. Favorite quotes:

It’s better to live the dream and assume that the harvest is assured, instead of pinchedly calculating the probability of happiness and refusing to risk anything when the odds are against you.  Or so I’ve learned from the humble asparagus.

and

It’s one of my basic principles as a gardener: Never trust anybody who tells you to dig deeper than a shovel’s depth.  I suspect that deep-digging is like Scientology, a cult of self-betterment for the gullible.

Read Full Post »

Cover Letters Can Be Hilarious

Really! It’s like Mad Libs.  See for yourself.

Here’s a sample….

To Whom It May Concern:

My name is Stripe Starcrest and I am applying for Disney’s Two-Headed Crab position. For the past year I have worked as a fortune cookie writer for the guy who stands there and watches in Constantinople. While this was an amazing experience, I  have decided to take a different direction with my career and focus on koala bears.

I am looking for a job that will utilize my genuine love of rib cartilage and penchant for sail boarding and Phoebe. I have hairy computer skills, cyanide poisoning experience, am a suggestive communicator (both visually and verbally) and am a very in-the-mood and easy-to-work with individual.

Attached for your review is my resume. I know that if we get the chance to meet, you will see what an asset I can be to Disney’s Pitching a Tent department. Thank you for your consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Step off,
Stripe Starcrest

Thanks for the Deluxe Cover-Letter-o-Matic, 2B1B-ers!

Read Full Post »